Thursday 15th November and I’m wondering whether or not to make the long trip north to Scarborough to see Marine (hopefully) get their second win of the season in the seaside town on the east coast of Yorkshire this coming Saturday. Will I? …Won’t I? I pondered the question for a while whilst gazing into nothingness on a boring Thursday afternoon at work. I finally decided I’d do it, I’d make the long trip north, my team needed me! Almost at the same time, my heart skipped a beat and Atrial Fibrillation kicked in! YOU BASTARD, YOU DIRTY GREAT BASTARD! I would now not be making the trip north to see another famous awayday victory by the mighty Marine AFC! The only place I’d be going if I didn’t take it easy and get some rest was A&E and theatre nine to get my ‘dicky ticker’ shocked back into normal rhythm! I’ve been battling the debilitating condition for almost six years and my heart is now kept going by a dirty cocktail of strong drugs and blood thinners! (GROWING OLD CAN BE A CRUEL PASTIME TO SOMEONE WHO THINKS HE’S STILL TWENTY ONE!)
The next twenty four hours sees my heart return to normal sinus rhythm and I’m back to thinking about Marine’s fixture at Scarborough. I’d have a late fitness test on Saturday morning to see if I’d make the trip! Saturday morning and I’m up with the larks at the crack of dawn and declare myself match fit for the trip.
“How do you fancy a trip to the seaside” I ask Katy, fully expecting wild cries of “yes please, I’ll just grab my bucket and spade”! “Nar, you’re alright” was all I got from ‘Der Kleiner Schlingel (the little rascal)! “Mum and I are off to the cinema and Pizza Express”! Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but when has the cinema and an overpriced pizza ever been a match for a trip to the seaside, even if you aren’t actually going to see the beach or the sea? NEVER, IN MY EXPERIENCE! “Marine are playing, there’ll be hotdogs and sticks of rock” I proudly boasted. “Well we’re having sweets, popcorn and pizza, so there” replied ‘Der Kleiner Schlingel’!
That was it, I’d be on my own, too late to ask my mate Rob if he fancied an afternoon on the east coast berating linesmen!
Without further ado I set off on the road with nothing more than a few CD’s by New Order, Everything But The Girl & a trusty bag of Uncle Joes mint balls to keep me company! I was now embarking on a journey that I took in nineteen seventy four when, as a child, I spent a week on holiday in Scarborough where it rained from the moment we arrived until the moment we left! I was hoping for better fortunes this time around!
The journey north was uneventful as mile followed mile and Bernard Sumner belted out classic song after classic song! I arrived in Scarborough at lunchtime, parked up near the north shore and headed straight to Peasholm Park and immediately relived those summer evenings in the early seventies when wrapped up from the rain in a blue cagoule, I’d spend hours here with my parents, riding on the dragon boats, walking through the beautiful gardens or my favourite, a night spent watching the famous naval warfare conflict!
After a good leg stretch and a wander back in time I transport myself back to twenty eighteen and head straight for the pub! I found myself in a Marston house, The Crown on Scalby Road. A swift pint of Snecklifter served in a pedigree glass (STANDARDS ARE GRAVELY LACKING & I TAKE THIS FAIX PAS AS A DIRECT INSULT TO THE AGE OLD GENTLEMANLY PASTIME OF QUAFFING GODS NECTAR & AN AFRONT TO NATURE ITSELF)! and a bag of McCoys later and I’m ready for the afore mentioned ‘famous awayday victory’! After exchanging a few pleasantries and sharing opinions with the Scarborough fans in there I’m on my way to the ground.
The Flamingo Land Stadium (THE EAST COAST IS AWASH WITH PINK, LONG LEGGED BIRDS) is a modern, no frills non-league ground that whilst looking somewhat unconventional, actually ticks all the boxes for what a ground at this level needs!
Programme, pie and Bovril in hand, I take up my spot down the far side touch line.
The game starts and Marine are put under pressure within the first few minutes, three half chances and a couple of gilt edged opportunities fall to the home side, they fail (somehow) to find the target, but the warnings are there for all to see! A free-kick on the edge of the box is an absolute peach from the boro number ten Michael Coulson and his effort is somehow acrobatically turned around the post courtesy of the save of the season by Marine keeper Germane Mendes! As the first half wares on, Marine start to win the midfield battle and assert their presence on the game! Honours even after forty five!
Halftime arrives along with the presence of Giles and James Horton, two fine gentlemen and long-standing Marine fans who I stand with at most away games. They quickly rip me to pieces for my choice of headwear, a classic Harris Tweed deerstalker! It’s clear that style is lost on some folk! As the players return from their halftime cuppa and a suck on an orange, talk of our fortunes or lack of them takes centre stage and the deerstalker has some much needed respite! Our hopes of that ‘famous awayday victory’ are raised as midfielder Steve Irwin has two superb chances to open the scoring and but for the fingertips of Boro keeper Tommy Taylor, he would have done so. Initial onslaught safely defused, Scarborough take control once more and in doing so take the lead! An old fashioned goalmouth scramble left Mendes clutching thin air and right back Ross Killock stabs the ball home and it’s one – nil! Ten minutes later it’s eleven verses ten as Marine’s Chris Doyle is shown a red card for something that only the linesman has seen or heard! (ROB WOULD HAVE HAD A FIELD DAY HAPPILY EDUCATING THE LINESMAN IN THE FINER ART OF THE LAWS OF THE GAME)!
Bizarrely, the incident changes the pattern of the second half and Marine take control and put the hosts under pressure as chance after chance goes begging for a much deserved equaliser! What happens in the last ten minutes is inevitable, a second Scarborough goal and the game is killed off along with our hopes of that all important ‘awayday victory’! The manner in which the goal comes is symptomatic of our season, the keeper calls for a back pass and a slightly under hit effort sees the hoist’s number ten nip in for his and their second, game over!
Scarborough cement their position at the top of the league and Marine, who have just gone toe to toe with the league leaders for ninety minutes with very little separating them firmly cement their place in the bottom three! (ITS A CRUEL WORLD AT TIMES)
“C’ est la vie”! I head back to the warmth of the car and turn the stereo on, New Order blasts out and Bernard Sumner sings about a lost causes and stoic fights for survival, at this moment in time I can truly relate to that!
Warm, relaxed but hungry, I pull over in the small village of Sherburn and within a bank of freezing fog the warm smell of a hundred coal fires fills the air. I head straight to the well recommend JR’s chippy and place my order, “‘I’ll be back in ten minutes” I cry above the din of frying fish and the chatter of locals planning their Christmas festivities (IT’S THE BLOODY 17th OF NOVEMBER)! I quickly fight my way through the darkness within the blanket of freezing fog and the acrid aroma of coal fires and find the door of what seems to be the village’s only pub. A warm fire is accompanied by a warm welcome and I’m soon admiring a fine pint of guest ale and chatting to two Scarborough fans who compliment me on Marine’s fine fighting performance and celebrate the fact that other results have gone their way on this day. I finish my pint and doff the deerstalker as i bid farewell to one and all! Back to the chip shop for my fish and chips and then back out and into the evening mix of fog and chimney smoke as I hunt for the car and more much needed warmth! Whilst eating the fish and chips (AND WHAT WONDERFUL FISH AND CHIPS THEY WERE) Robbie Savage and Jason Mohammed along with a steady stream of fans of Premier League football clubs none of whom have ever seen a live game spew their benign drivel upon my ears from the car radio and I sit back and thank my lucky stars that I follow non league football where real fans watch real football played with real passion and real commitment along with the odd pint or two of real ale! Welcome to the REAL world!
Marine’s last awayday victory was at Brackley Town in the cup on October the sixth! There’ll be other opportunities to witness one of those famous awayday victory’s where you’re amongst likeminded people who you know by first name, this gang of hardy souls, this brotherhood of man, THIS HAPPY FAMILY OF MARINERS!
THANKS FOR READING THIS PIECE OF LITERARY GENIUS WRITTEN BY A MAN IN SEARCH OF ONE OF THOSE AWAYDAY VICTORYS.
FORZA MARINE! FORZA NON-LEAGUE!
…Respectfully dedicated to Ben Williams, AFC Liverpool. Forever a part of the non league family! Rest easy mate!
THIS SPORTING LIFE 